vitaminsobsession:

fuckyeah-nerdery:

worthyourweightinfanfiction:

buttships-were-meant-2spooky:

this is the best thing in the entire world

she should greet jane as if nothing happened and see how jane reacts

she should avoid school the next day. And the next. Every night, she should put on the exact outfit she had on that day, hose herself down until she’s completely drenched and stand in Jane’s yard. When Jane is home alone, she should approach the window, staring at her. Knock on it if you don’t have her attention. 

That’ll get her back for killing you and trying to hide the evidence.

Ease up there, Satan.

Ease up? SHE TRIED TO KILL HER

(via psychedelic-orchids-in-her-hair)

  • Satan: [appears]
  • Satan: You can have anything you wan--
  • Me: LANGUAGE.
  • Satan: What?
  • Me: GIVE ME EVERY LANGUAGE.
  • Satan: What the--?
  • Me: YOU SAID ANYTHING. GIVE ME EVERY LANGUAGE IN THE WORLD.
  • Satan: Wouldn't you rather have love or money?
  • Me: EVERY. LANGUAGE. MASTERY OF EVERY LANGUAGE. NOW.
hip-hop-quest:

Everybody on tumblr right now
britney2007spears:

that has to be the ugliest way to cut a carrot congratulations

britney2007spears:

that has to be the ugliest way to cut a carrot congratulations

(via cyclopssanders)

How rape trials should go?

  • Lawyer: Did he rape her?
  • Witness: Yes, but she was drunk and passed out.
  • Lawyer: That's not what I asked. Did he rape her?
  • Witness: Yes, but she was wearin-
  • Lawyer: I didn't ask what she was wearing. Did he rape her?
  • Witness: Yes, but-
  • Lawyer: I didn't ask anything else. It's just a simple yes or no answer. Did he rape her?
  • Witness: Yes.
  • Laywer: Yes, he raped her.
  • Rape is rape is rape, no matter the context.